


A Strange Coincidence

by Mcusekat



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Fake AH Crew, Hotel Sex, M/M, Riding, pre crew
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-30
Updated: 2015-09-30
Packaged: 2018-04-24 03:17:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4903480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mcusekat/pseuds/Mcusekat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>'We both tried to rob the bank at the same time' AU</p><p>Ryan prepared for the job for 2 weeks. Nothing was wrong, no sirens in the distance. Everything was perfect.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Strange Coincidence

**Author's Note:**

> This prompt came from a prompt post, which you can view [here](http://philisnotofire.tumblr.com/post/105222610038/oddly-specific-aus-i-need)

  Ryan prepared for the job for 2 weeks. He felt as relaxed as ever the day of, armed to the teeth with body armor and a fast getaway car filled with gas. It was a normal Friday, pay day. The bank was bustling with activity as he approached it. Nothing was wrong, no sirens in the distance. Everything was perfect.

  Confidently, he walked in and drew the gun from his belt.

  “This is a hold up, everybody get down or get a bullet in the face!”

  Ryan was stunned for a moment. He held the gun limply at his side as a smaller character in a bright purple hoodie and white mask waved an AK-47 at a crowd of people huddling against the wall. He fired once at tellers before tossing a duffle bag at them and demanding they put all the money in there.

  He spun around and noticed Ryan, standing there dumbly. Ryan quickly snapped back to reality as the man strided towards him.

  “Who the hell are you?” he asked quickly.  

  “The Vagabond. Who the hell are you?” Ryan said. “You stole my target.”

  He barked out a laugh. “Ha! You came to hold up this joint too? That’s fucking hilarious!”

  Ryan could see the irony in the situation, but he was losing money so he found it hard to laugh. The man sobered at Ryan’s lack of response.

  “Sorry for talking your hit. If you go empty the vault I’ll split the cash with you though. Oh, I’m, uh, Brownman.”

  Ryan pondered the offer before finding this to be his best course of action. The guy sounded friendly, despite being a criminal. He hopped over the counter and took a teller hostage.

  It didn’t take him long to ransack every bill he saw. Most of the money was locked up in safe deposit boxes, so he only took what was laying out on trolleys. He joined the other back in the lobby and tossed the bag over his shoulder.

  “Cops will be here any minute. I have a bike outside if you can cover me,” Brownman said quickly, heading to the door as soon as he saw Ryan.

  “Bike?”

  He nodded, a little awkward.

  “Follow me,” Ryan said, sighing.

  They exited the bank and entered the firefight. The cops were just arriving as they exited, and when they got out as soon as they say the two leaving the bank.

  “Get down!” the police officers yelled. Brownman drew first blood, nailing an officer between the eyes. Ryan had no time to be surprised as it only took a half second for the cops to retaliate. Ryan grabbed his arm and pulled him to cover behind a car parked on the curb.

  He could see the alleyway he had to run down to get to the getaway car.

  “We need to get down there,” Ryan said over the sound of a hail of bullets hitting the car behind them.

  Brownman set aside his AK in favor of a pistol, and in one clip knocked off the 10 closest officers. Ryan couldn’t do much in his position, furthest from the scene, so he did all he could. He pulled a grenade out of his bag and turned to Brownman.

  “Get ready to make a run for it,” he said, a grin on his face, concealed under the mask.

  he opened his mouth to say something but Ryan already pulled the tab and tossed the grenade into the middle of the swarm. The explosion vibrated the entire street, and suddenly the gunfire was muted as the cacophony of warped sirens and screaming filled the block. They ran as fast as they could, rounding the corner to relative safety.

  They were able to lose the ground force, utilizing the maze of alleyways. There was a police chopper but it had yet to get near enough to see them. Ryan kept his gun at ready, just in case it did.

  They eventually made their way to where Ryan stashed his car.

  “Holy shit, this is yours?” Brownman said. He ran his palm over the sleek blue Adder, grinning.

  Ryan grinned back before remembering the other couldn’t see. “Yep. Cost 1.67 mil,” Ryan said. He pulled his keys from his pocket and unlocked it. He whistled in response.

  They climbed in and tossed the bags in the back. “We’re going to blend in with traffic,” Ryan said, giving Brownman a look.

  He seemed to understand what Ryan meant because he pulled off his hoodie and reached back to undo his mask.

  Ryan turned to pull off his own. He hadn’t shown his face to anyone before, having usually worked alone. Ryan was unsure, but ultimately decided that showing his face to one lowly criminal he’d never even heard of before was better than compromising the heist.

  He turned to look at the other once his jacket and mask was off. He was handsome, more so than Ryan thought he’d be. He was examining Ryan with a curious look on his face.

  “Sweet bun dude,” he said. Ryan reached up to touch his hair absently. It’d grown long recently, and he hadn’t cared to get it cut, so he put it in a bun to keep it out of the way.

  “Thanks,” he replied, smiling at Brownman.

  “Where are we dividing up the cash?”

  “Motel?”

  “Motel? At least buy me a drink first,” Brownman said, grinning.

  Ryan rolled his eyes but he smiled back. “I don’t drink.”

  The other chuckled and leaned back. “That’s two things we have in common,” Brownman said. “We both don’t drink, and we both robbed the Union Depository bank. Sure sounds like fate to me.”

  Ryan pulled into the parking lot of some pay-by-the-hour motel. The sun was setting and the backlit sign was on, flickering in the waning sunlight. There was a fox with a cane and a top hat on the sign but not much else. Ryan pulled in  the mostly empty lot and parked.

  They climbed out and walked into the reception area. There was a desk at on side of the rectangular room, a row of plastic lawn chairs lined against the other. The windows were drawn closed and a single bulb and the computer monitor lit the room. A stand with brochures for various vacation spots was pushed against the other. Many of the brochures were missing.

  They got a room key and went back out to the car. Inside the room they tossed the duffels on the bed and inspected the room. There was a giant mirror behind the bed, as well as a circular one above the bed. An inspection of the bathroom revealed that the shower had two heads, one normal height and one groin level. The name of the hotel was carved into the remote for the tv, and written in sharpie on the sheets, pillow, and trashcan. Yelp had given this hotel 3 stars, but Ryan couldn’t see why.

  Ray didn’t seem to care. He flopped on the bed and turned on the tv as soon as they were in. It was already tuned to some cheap porno with bad lighting, a man with a blue butterfly tattoo thrusting desperately into a bored looking woman. Ray watched for a second before flipping to another channel showing some John Travolta movie.

  “So, Brownman, are we going 50/50?”

  Ray set the remote down and looked up from the movie. “Call me Ray. And, yeah sure. Do you think you deserve more?” He raised an eyebrow.

  “No, just wondering if you were.”

  Ray shrugged. “It’s more about the journey than the destination,” Ray said in a fake prophetic voice.

  They carefully emptied out the bag and began dividing up the stacks. It was a quiet process, not much talking. By the end they both ended up with about 500k, give or take. Ryan was pleased. It was his average intake from a solo heist, if not a tad bit more. It was also more fun with a partner, someone to talk to on the getaway, someone to shoot the cops with eerie precision.

  “We work well together, Vagabond,” Ray said as he shoved his money into his duffle.

  “You think?” Ryan said. “And, my name is Ryan.”

  “Another thing we have in common, names starting with an R.”

  Ryan laughed, but didn’t reply.

  Ray leaned back on the bed, stretching his legs. “We have three hours in this room.”

  Ryan raised an eyebrow. “What are you insinuating?”

  Ray shrugged. “What do you think I’m insinuating?”

  Ryan let his eyes skim over the other man. He was cute, funny, a damn good shot. Ryan was actually kind of attached to him. He didn’t want just a one night stand with Ray, he wanted something more, something he would never admit to wanting. But, fuck if he was going to pass up the chance to screw him.

  “I think you’re propostioning sex, and I think I’d like to take you up on the offer.”

  A slow grin creeped onto Ray’s lips. “You don’t have any herpes, do you?”

  “Nope.”

  “Great, let’s get started!” Ray sat up and pulled off his shirt. Ryan moved to kneel on the bed in front of him, hands moving to grace over the dark skin there. Ray shuddered, leaning in to the touch. Ryan moved to kiss him, but realized he was unsure of the boundaries.

  “I, uh, is it okay to kiss on the mouth?”

  “Yeah,” Ray said before tugging Ryan’s head close. Ryan was pleased to find his mouth tasted like coffee and toothpaste, nothing bad. He was also pleased to find that Ray was very sensitive everywhere. He undid the button to his jeans and slid his hand down the front. Ray’s hips raised to grind into Ryan’s hand, and he moaned. Ryan’s cock got harder at the sound alone.

  “How do you want..” he asked.

  Ray’s eyes opened. His pupils were blown, dark with lust. He didn’t have that smirk over his lips anymore, either. Rather he was breathing heavily panting almost.

  Ray looked dazed, but after a moment he reached over to the nightstand and grabbed his wallet. He pulled out a condom and handed it to Ryan. “Can I ride you?”

  Ryan’s breath hitched. “Yeah.”

  They switched positions, Ryan lying flat on the bed and Ray straddling his waist. Ray’s eyes were closed and one corner of his lips was pulled into his mouth in concentration. One hand was behind him, preparing himself, and the other hand was on Ryan’s chest, blunt nails digging in. Ryan watched the mirror above them as Ray readied  himself. He had a view of Ray’s back, Ray’s fingers disappearing inside himself, Ray’s lithe body moving just slightly into his fingers. He rubbed his cock slowly, enough to relieve the pressure marginally but not enough to bring him to orgasm.

  “Fuck Rye,” Ray muttered, eyes opening to watch Ryan’s hand. His hips suddenly stuttered forward and a small moan escaped his mouth as he found the prostate. “I’m ready. You ready?”

  “Oh yeah,” Ryan said.

  Ray’s fingers left and he wiped them off on the bedsheet. He moved forward and positioned himself over Ryan’s cock, then sunk in slowly. Ryan cursed steadily, hands going to grab at Ray’s hips. When Ray had taken him all in he paused to adjust, then started to move his hips. He angled his hips so Ryan’s cock hit his prostate, and after that he started faster.

  Ryan watched incredulously. Ray was so tight that he could hardly take it. He wasn’t going to last long, he knew. He took Ray’s cock and tried to match the paces, and soon both were moaning. Ray was leaning back to get a better angle, hands grasping Ryan’s thigh. Ryan’s hands were sprawled on Ray’s slender torso, fisting his cock. He watched the mirror above the bed, tried to commit the way Ray’s neck looked as he dipped his head back to moan, the rise of his chest as he panted, the feel of his body around his cock.

  “Ryan, I’m-” Ray gasped.

  “Do it,” Ryan said, speeding up his hand. He was close too, he could feel the pressure building in his lower gut.

  “Fuck Rye,” Ray gasped. His hand moved to his cock and he sped the pace even more. With a choked moan he spilled over Ryan’s stomach. Ryan was close behind, and Ray rode him through.

  Afterwards Ryan fell limp. For a moment it was just silence as they caught their breath. When Ryan was able, he sat up and pulled off the condom, tying it off and tossing it into the trash can beside the bed.

  “Jesus Christ, Ryan, that was great,” Ray said.

  “Yeah it was,” Ryan said. He grabbed a box of tissues off the nightstand and cleaned off his stomach. Ray propped himself up on his elbows and grabbed his phone.

  Ray hesitated. “We only have 30 minutes left here. If you…” He paused for a moment then continued. “If you ever want to do that again, here.”

  He stood and walked to the table where the hotel stationery was. He wrote something down and handed it to Ryan, a phone number.

  “It’s a disposable phone. I’ll give you my real one after I’ve known you longer than a couple hours.”

  Ryan smiled. “Fair enough,” he said. He tucked the paper into his wallet safely.

  Ray stared at him for a moment before leaning in for another kiss. Ryan reciprocated without a thought, hand finding it’s way to Ray’s hair and holding him there.

  “Fuck,” he muttered, “I can’t believe I almost shot you back in the bank.”

  Ryan smiled. “I’m glad you didn’t,” he said.

  “Me too,” Ray said. He stood up and stretched. “C’mon, we’ve probably got hepatitis c from these bed sheets.”

  Ryan peeled himself from the bed and started putting his clothes on. “Probably more than that. Look at this place.”

  “Did you see the crotch shower?”

  Ryan laughed at that. “Yeah I did,” he said.

  “Want to try it?”

  “Gross, no.”

  “We can go to the Ritz-Carlton,” he said. “We have enough for the presidential suite. We can bang where the president might someday sleep.”

  “Tempting, but I’m not spending $6,000 for a hotel.”

  “Ugh, what a buzzkill.”

  It was dark outside now, but that didn’t stop Los Santos. Cars and people lined the road, and all kinds of characters wandered the sidewalk. Ray’s apartment was in the bad parts of town so when he offered to let Ryan stay the night he had to take the time to park it in the garage. Ray had a spare lot, as he didn’t drive.

  They slept in late, sore and exhausted everywhere. Ryan didn’t wake until he smelled food cooking nearby. Ray was standing at the counter pouring syrup over a stack of toaster waffles.

  “Hey, I made breakfast,” Ray said, beckoning to the stove. “I should warn you though, I’m an awful cook.”

  Ryan chuckled and shook his head. He sat at the table and Ray set a plate in front of him. Waffles with a single egg and a piece of slightly charred toast. Ryan thanked him and started eating.

  They were quiet over breakfast, both struggling for words to say.

  “Let’s clear up the elephant in the room,” Ray said. “What’s going to happen after you go home? I’ll be honest, I would like this to go further than just sex. I mean, you’re an incredible fuck,” he said, then shrugged, “But I’d like something more meaningful than screwing.”

  “So would I,” Ryan said, “Do you want to plan a date?”

  Ray chuckled. “Yeah sure. I don’t own a single piece of formal wear so let’s go casual.”

  “Fair enough,” Ryan said.

  They planned the date over breakfast. Ryan brought up the prospect of them working together, which Ray agreed to. Ryan was pleased; with a job and a date planned out between the two of them he knew they would at least stay in contact.

 Ryan spent the rest of the day in a good mood. He sat on the couch when he got home and turned on the tv. They were reporting on some bank robbery yesterday, not his. It was two people, some older guy and some British kid. They talked briefly about the raise in crime activity, both the reporters astounded by the two bank robberies in the last day. Ryan was surprised too, but he didn’t think on it much.

  He was distracted, thinking about Ray. He was excited to see how this played out. He hadn’t dated in years, since he started heisting for a living. He worried briefly if he even could date anymore. He stopped though. Ray was obviously attracted to him, and he was attracted to Ray. He knew they got along well, knew he didn’t have a thing to worry about.

  For the first time in years he felt optimistic about the future.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Fun fact: The hotel is based of a real place in LA called the Snooty Fox. It's probably the sleaziest motel ever, and the mirrors/crotch shower/name on literally everything is actually a thing that exists at that place. It's incredible. 
> 
> Anyways, come be my friend on [Tumblr](http://desertsongs.co.vu/) (I take prompts). And please don't forget to give kudos and leave a nice comment down below! Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated!


End file.
